Thursday, January 20, 2011

So here I am sitting in my kitchen in the early hours of the morning knowing that I need to go to bed but, I just started this blog so I now can't... I am back in the Cedar of cities and I'm liking school so far. BIG NEWS. I brought one of my family's cars down this semester so I can go to the store to by my milk all by myself and start acting a bit more grown up. I will probably be getting my own car in the next month or two and cross your fingers that its one that I will love and will be good to me in the years to come. The semester so far has been pretty quiet. One of my roommates, Steph, graduated in the fall so she didn't come back in the Spring so that is a bummer but she is on doing big stuff. I have only been down here for two weeks and already I am learning more life lessons that will help me in the future... hopefully. This is just a side note but, has anyone ever felt like they learn the same life lesson more than once and they just feel stupider each time they make the same mistake? I'm not saying I have or anything... I mean who does that? Anyway, I just have come to the conclusion that forgiveness is truly divine. I seriously don't know how people hold onto grudges for people... to me it takes so much effort to be angry at someone for more than an hour. I tend to forget a lot of the time that I should be angry at someone... Some people would say that is weak but, I find it to be a strength. If you can't even remember you're angry at someone than you must love that person a great deal right? My favorite though is when two people hate each other and you ask them why and they don't even remember the argument or disagreement that broke their relationship. I think that is weak. It kind of reminds me of the quote that says "Hate is easy but, Love takes courage". I think sometimes we put a wall up so we don't get hurt but most of the time that wall is doing nothing but crumbling down on us and we become our own enemy. Don't get me wrong I'm not saying that I'm perfect because I am very far from it... My mind is just going at a mile a minute. Something that I can say is that I've asked forgiveness from everyone that I feel I have wronged in anyway and that is pretty satisfying. If you are reading this blog and I have been mean to you or something let me know and I will make you a card with cookies and be at your house in a flash. To me, being on good terms with everyone I'm around is a big deal to me. Even if I have a little tiff with one of my homies I get super bummed out and have to talk to them before I feel alright about it again. Something else that I have been discovering is that if you feel iffy about something confront it and if it doesn't go your way then you have to look at it in the perspective that you've done all you can and that you have to let things be sometimes. If it's meant to be , it's meant to be.Do all you can do and then go on your way. Now that I have got all my philosophical thoughts out of my head let me just close with something happier.
 I am now ready to go to bed...it's two days until the weekend and Alan is comin to town.

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